I want to give myself a clean shave every day or every two days.
And I know this sounds boring as fuck, but let me explain… as there is something interesting to learn about this.
The reason why I decided this is because I decided that I deserve better. That I deserve to feel handsome and to be attractive to the opposite sex. It’s a sign of self-love.
Now, truth be told, when one thinks self-love, doesn’t think of shaving. But isn’t it? I mean, when you dress nice, take care of yourself, eat the right foods, look good, isn’t that a ritual of self-love?
When a girl wakes up in the morning and spends two hours putting make-up and nice clothes, isn’t that her way of saying – I deserve to feel beautiful and attractive and I’ll act towards this?
I know it sounds strange as fuck… and it sounded strange when I realised this too, but we treat ourselves as good or as bad as we think we deserve. I’m starting to realise that if a person doesn’t groom, man or woman, it is not so much because of bad grooming habits or education or cultural influence as it is a sense of self-worth.
It is a belief of “who am I to take good care of myself?”. After all, self-psychology is exactly this – we tend to act in accordance with the belief that we have about ourselves. If we consider ourselves not worthy, our behaviour will then reflect. We decide how good we should be treated and then we actually treat ourselves that way… or expect others to do so.
So yeah… me deciding to get a clean shave every day is not world breaking news, but you understanding the psychology of self and how inner concepts of self-esteem are a direct reflection of outer behaviour may just be.
And to this sense of self, we also attach standards. What we are willing to accept and what we are not willing to not accept. It is closely related to boundaries both internal and external.
I know people who would never go outside with a clean, pressed shirt. And I know people who didn’t bothered to clean their hoodie in the last three months.
This has nothing to do with vanity. It has to do with a standard. And standards apply to other things too. One may have a standard that she can be only 50 kilograms. Another woman may have a very loose standard around 70 or 80 or 90 kilograms.
One may have a standard that he can’t earn less than $100.000 this year. Another may have a standard of “roof over his head and food in his belly”.
I guess in the end this is not about looking good. I don’t particularly think that shaving makes me that more interesting. It is just a note from myself to myself, saying each day…
“Razvan, you deserve to feel good in your own skin. You deserve to treat yourself good. You are worthy of your OWN love and admiration”.
And it starts with a shave.
Strange how all the dots start to connect and I’m starting to understand everything.